Here's a Quick Tip for a Quick Win with your parenting...
>>To improve communication -- Talk Less. Listen More<<
The other day, my 20 year old son called and talked to me for 45 minutes
about all the things that were going on for him. I mostly listened with an occasional "hmm" or "oh". At the end of the call, he said, "Great conversation, Mom!" As I continue to practice the validation and anchoring techniques I’m learning from Kathy, I’m realizing that the less I talk the better it is! I used to get a pit in my stomach when my son would call or text, expressing that he was having a hard time or feeling sad. Now I notice that I feel more ease in my interactions with him, however he feels. I have more energy afterwards and no more pit in my stomach! (Angela, mom of three)
It’s our job to take care of our child. We want them to be happy, that’s only natural.
And when they're unhappy or distressed we want to DO something to help.
Where it can get tricky is when our desire for them to be happy compels us to think we have to fix their problems, or even fix their feelings.
Here's the thing. Listening and validating IS doing something.
And it's something that creates an invitation to talk to us more - the very thing our heart desires.
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