Rate each of these skills on a scale of 1-10 with 10 being “I’ve got this!” or “most of the time” and 1 being “I don’t even know where to start!” or “almost never.”

 

1 Self-Regulation ____

I can quickly and easily bring myself back to a state of calm when my buttons are pushed or when I feel triggered by something/someone. Skill-building Tip

 

2 Predictability ____ 

I have systems in place so my child knows what to expect on any given day and/or week. I’ve created predictable rhythms for bedtime and mornings. Skill-building Tip

 

3 Consistency ____ 

I follow through on my systems for predictability most of the time. I have created a consistent, predictable daily plug-in time with my child. Skill-building Tip

 

4 Listening ____

I’m able to listen to my child’s behavior as a communication of what they need or they’re feeling. Skill-building Tip

 

5 Validation ____

I’m able to validate what my child is feeling apart from correcting their behavior. I have space to hold my child’s big feelings without feeling compelled to fix them or immediately find a solution. Skill-building Tip

 

6 Boundaries ____ 

I have boundaries that set my child up for success, in line with what I have control over and not to try to control another person‘s behavior. Skill-building Tip

 

7 Repair ____

I take personal responsibility for my own thoughts and feelings. I’m able to calm my own dysregulation enough to be available to do what I need to do to restore loving connection. Skill-building Tip

 

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These parenting relationship skills are not a one and done. They are an ongoing practice of growth. Connection always matters more than perfection!

 

Once you’ve rated each one, go back and click the link below the skills that need the most strengthening. A skill building tip awaits you there.